Recently I spent an entire day and evening in my pyjamas on my bed and couch, and I wasn’t unwell. I listened to the radio, watched two films, read, ate, stared out the window – that’s all. It was a Saturday so I told myself that I was doing my take on the Jewish day of rest known as Shabbat. But this wasn’t enough to stop me from having moments of guilt, especially as I was also ignoring phone notifications and with the sun out after days of grey, I felt like I should at least have a walk to my local newsagent.
With the lives that most of us have these days I wonder if the art of relaxing is becoming a forgotten skill. When, for our self-esteem, we are listing our character strengths, perhaps we should also ask ourselves, “How slow can I go?”
If sleep gives us beauty, then I reckon decelerating may put the ageing process into slow motion. (Not that there should be anything wrong with growing older, but sure I want to always look younger than I am!) I know that faffing around at home doing nothing of significance can be boring, but since when did boredom become the enemy and doesn’t inspiration spring from a substantial pause from activity?
That Saturday I went so slowly – getting out of bed around 3pm and going back to it by 10pm – that Sunday ended by being a productive day, and by Monday I was humming a line from the song Feelin’ Groovy – “Slow down you move too fast, got to make the morning last.” Like Simon & Garfunkel, so many great artists have told us that their creative fire is lit when they’re relaxed. Maybe that’s how come people say to sleep on a problem.
I also like to swim on a problem. After doing lengths at the pool at my local gym, I’ll likely arrive at the sauna with solutions to any pressing dilemmas that got into the water with me. And when a problem is not immediately solved, in my most un-anxious state after swimming, I’m at least more carefree. Worry is a misuse of imagination, someone wise once declared.
Relaxing or “hunkering down” (an expression I first heard from New Zealand’s Prime Minister Jacinda Arden during covid times) is what I call a preventive health measure. Many people need to do household errands or family obligation on at least one of their weekend days. That’s why I’m all for the four-day week and if I ever had a protest banner it would read: Reclaim The Weekend!
Of course there are times when being chilled or laidback is not an option. We might need to burn the midnight oil at work or find ourselves in a terrible situation which urges us to act, or at least find relief in a round of expletives! Sometimes life asks us to act like a firefighter or be as alert as a bobby on the beat. But whenever we return to a place of calm and rest, then we have the opportunity to switch off from human doing and experience human being.
